Week from Hell… No Just another week on earth

Every day I feel like I have someone sitting on my chest

I cant breath… 

Everything going on in our life is a mess

How can I fix it, how can I make it right? 

I am so tired of Doctor appointments

I am so tired of lawyers

I am so tired of losing my friend and not understanding why

I hate that I wake up everyday in pain just to live through the day to wake up the next day in pain

I want a plan… 

Can I have a do over? Is it to late

Wake up tomorrow and just change my life. Change the way I live, the way I act, the things I do, become a whole different person? Maybe if I dislike the way things are going now I need to reset my life. My husbands life, my kids life. 

now its crazy meds talking… I just know I cant live the rest of my life like this. I have to change something, anything. HELP!!! 

Learning to help myself

Why did I start blogging? I’m a private person and in no way educated enough to write a great story. Or at least that is how I perceive myself. Resently I started talking to an amazing women Andrea. I get great insight from what she has to say. She motivates and keeps me going. The last time we spoke she told me that I am teaching her something’s as well. I never thought my life could be a lesson for others..

I want to find others that are going through this with me. Maybe then I won’t feel as alone? Knowing other people are out in the world right now feeling the same way. I have no reason to feel ashamed. That might sound weird but it’s hard to describe all the feelings one can have when their head is in constant pain.

Blogging will be one way that I help myself:) getting out my feelings. Sharing how I feel even if I don’t share that I have a blog with any of my friends and family because I’m chicken shit.. I can still feel good that I am doing something I want to do.